Adam's Birth Story

I was told that Braxton Hicks get more frequent, annoying, and start earlier with each pregnancy.  I have been having contractions for a long time.  I am not sure exactly when they started.  They were once every few days, then once a day, then twice a day...  They never hurt.  Just part of the wonders of pregnancy.

Remember in the last post when we went camping in the backyard?  Well, I was having contractions that night.  They were starting to be pretty strong, but still not super often.  Nothing I couldn't handle. ;)

The first time they hurt at all was every time I turned over during that night in the backyard.  They were strong but only lasted 30 seconds or so.  I have struggled with dehydration and figured that was the problem.  On the 17th, I had them throughout the day and by the afternoon they were about two times an hour. 

***I am going to stop here for a moment and point out that hindsight is 20-20.  Of course it is obvious what is coming because you already know the end of the story!  I look like a moron in this story.  Don't judge me!  No one expects to be in labor at 32 weeks so it is easy to justify why you might feel that way.  Also, you only go to the hospital when your contractions are between 5-10 minutes apart, REGULAR, and TIME-ABLE.  None of these things EVER happened.

Sometimes they were 35 minutes apart, sometimes 20.  Never the same interval twice.  I started having to stop what I was doing for about 45 seconds while it lasted (around dinnertime).  It was then that my smarter half (Benjamin) asked me why this wasn't concerning to me.  I decided to call the doctor.

Well, the answering machine said my doctor charges a $30 fee every time you call the on-call doctor.  I am cheap and didn't want to call for him to say, "Drink some water.  Stop complaining.  That will be $30 please."  So I called Labor and Delivery at the hospital.

The nurse told me that putting my feet up, resting, and drinking lots of water would help it out.  When I said it started while I was laying down sleeping for an entire night, she told me to come in and get checked.  So now I was thinking I would have to drive to the hospital, while finding a babysitter, for them to tell me, "Drink some water.  Stop complaining.  That will be $300 please."

I asked for a blessing and Benjamin said a lot of great things.  Looking back, he never said, "Your baby is not going to come."  He talked about dealing with the pain and that I would have comfort and peace in my mind.

So I laid down and put my feet up, hoping to try that one more time.  But the contractions didn't stop.  So I called back Labor and Delivery right after shift change, which meant a new nurse.  The new nurse told me that she wouldn't worry yet.  She said really take it easy.  Laying down for an hour isn't all that it takes.  Don't worry.  Everything will be fine.  You don't dilate until they are closer together.  At least that is what I got out of it.  My blessing said I would receive comfort, so I thought it came by way of the spirit AND the nurse's reassurance.  

So Benjamin put the girls to bed and I laid in his lap while we watched a movie and he played with my hair.  The contractions still came, but they didn't hurt as bad, so I thought they were subsiding.  We planned on me being on self-imposed bed rest the next day.  I only had to make it until Monday morning at 8:45 am.  It was Friday night.  I could lay around and watch chick flicks and have Benjamin bring me snacks for a weekend.  Didn't seem half bad, really.  And while I wasn't feeling a lot of stress, I had been doing tons of stuff and trying to coordinate plane flights, child care, car rentals, hotel reservations and schedules for everything coming in the next week.

After the movie, we went to bed around midnight.  Between one and two, I woke up twice, but it didn't really hurt.  At 2:40 am, I had a big contraction that hurt.  I was able to breathe through it, but couldn't get back to sleep before the next one came.  STILL NOT TIME-ABLE.  They were closer together, 12-20 minutes apart instead of 20-35 minutes apart.  I went through the contractions in the dark, sometimes sitting up to rock and breathe through them as the night wore on.  I was very careful to not wake up Benjamin.  He had no idea any of it was happening.  

Deep down I knew that it wasn't normal, but I didn't want to make a scene in the middle of the night.  I was definitely in denial.  Words like "progressing" and "laboring" were crossing my mind, but I was quick to dismiss them because those words implied I was in labor.  That was a ridiculous thought.  I was only 32 weeks pregnant and so that couldn't happen. 

At 5 am, I was rocking through a contraction when Benjamin woke up and asked me if I was ok.  I couldn't answer him during the contraction, but told him I was going to take a bath because my back was hurting (back labor---HELLO!?!?!) and the hot water would probably help.  I was really stressed about it but did my best not to show it.

Well, the bathtub doesn't hold water very well, so it drained fairly quickly.  Between that and the fact it was like putting a whale in a petri dish (where the water didn't even begin to cover my growing belly), I was only in the tub between 5 and 10 minutes.  When I got out, I realized that Adam was now head down instead of side to side as he had always been.  Also not a great sign.  

So I called the nurse back again.  She acted surprised I was calling and said, "I was wondering why I didn't hear from you sooner.  I figured you would call back by 9 pm and I would have you come in."  So her reassuring was just to make me stay calm until I came in.  Silly me.  I thought she meant there really wasn't a problem.

Benjamin and I put our clothes on and went upstairs.  Terry had a thing for work all day and was already in the shower.  Cathy worked a night shift and wasn't home yet.  So what do we do with the girls?  While we were discussing what to do with them, I had 5 contractions only minutes apart.  That put fuel to my fire and I started taking it as seriously as Benjamin was about getting me to the hospital.  We woke up the girls and Terry hung around until Cathy could get home.  I would find out later that Casey came over and watched the girls for a few hours while Cathy slept.  Everybody seemed to come together to get me to the hospital.

As we walked to the car, I had to stop walking because another contraction hit and I couldn't walk anymore.    When I got in the car I told Benjamin I didn't want to get in an accident or get pulled over, but, "feel free to drive as fast as you like."  He obliged.  And he wanted to drive pretty fast.  He also saw that no one was coming and turned left on a red light.  He was willing to do what it took to take care of me.  :)

On the drive I felt like saying the same phrase as when Haley was born, "It feels like someone else is sitting on my bum."  hmmm  And yet, I only wondered how long I would have to stay before they stopped the contractions so I could go home.  Benjamin told me later he was pretty sure that they wouldn't be able to stop the labor he was sure I was in.  He just wondered how long they could prolong it.  My water never broke.  So that was a good sign...

I came into the hospital (moving slowly but as fast as I could) and they were ready and waiting for me.  We had nothing but the clothes we were wearing.  No camera, no extra clothes, none of the things every pregnancy magazine says we should have in our "hospital to go bag".  They sent me right into a room ready for me, had me change my clothes and lay on the bed.  They asked if I felt the urge to push.  Honestly I have never felt that urge since both my girls were with an epidural.  I had no intention of EVER feeling the need to push.  Turns out I know what that feels like, and I had it.

As the nurse checked me, another nurse walked in and said, "Do I need to call the doctor?"  My nurse replied with, "Yes, because she is at a 9."  For those that don't know, a baby comes out when you dilate to 10 cm.  I was almost ready.  There was NO stopping it.

That's when the panic came.  I don't think that I have ever felt that way.  At least not for a long time.  All kinds of thoughts came out of my mouth, all jumbled.  "He isn't ready.  I don't want to do this.  What about graduation?  He won't be able to breathe.  He needs more time.  What about the girls?  I wanted to go to graduation..."  Benjamin touched my face and told me that it would all be alright.  They tried to start the IV, which took two nurses and Benjamin to calm me down enough to let my arm down (with the help of some topical numbing stuff and a contraction that had me distracted).

No time for steroids or pain meds.  They wheeled me into the operating room and the NICU team stood on the other side of the window waiting to take him away, because there was no chance for him to not need their help.

By the way, I just want to add that even as I was pushing, I still did not have regular contractions.  They had to give me pitocin to make my contractions more regular.

We got there at 7:30 am.  The doctor got there around 8.  Adam Arthur was born at 8:28 am.  It was 100% natural, and only lasted as long as it did because he got stuck for a while coming out face up instead of face down.  You can ask Benjamin about how graceful I was giving birth naturally.  All I can say is that I didn't curse!  When I hear people talk about natural child birth being beautiful and you being more present and...  Seriously folks.  I have done it both ways.  If you have the chance, take the epidural.  Every. Time.

When he came out, they laid him on my tummy on some warm blankets and rubbed him down.  I remember Benjamin saying, "Look at him honey!  He is so cute!"  But honestly it is a fuzzy memory.  I was a little low on oxygen and got a little pale, so I remember him, but everything else is hazy.  He cried, which made me breathe a little bit, and then they took him out of the room.  I didn't get to touch him or anything.  

They wheeled me back into the room I started out in.  Once I was settled, Benjamin went (with my blessing) to check on Adam.  The nurses left the room.

I was sitting there alone trying to figure out what just happened.  It was a super surreal moment.  I knew life would never be the same again, and it wasn't the same "different" life as I was expecting, if that makes any sense at all.  I had my next child.  A beautiful baby boy.  My life would change.  I just wasn't counting on spending so much time learning about premature babies, going through the roller coaster of watching him adjust to life outside of the womb before he was ready, spending time at a hospital while my girls were being watched by others, not moving into the townhome I had already paid the rent on, not going to the graduation my sweetheart had worked his entire life for, for the months once he will come home keeping him home because his immune system isn't as strong as it should be...

There is a lot I wasn't planning on.  All I can say is that everything in our lives all lined up.  We are sure this was supposed to happen.  We know that he will be strong and healthy and have no long term effects in his life.  We will be forever changed.  We have learned so much already about the gospel, Heavenly Father, and ourselves.  We have learned about the love our Heavenly Father has for us and the complete control he has when we have none.  I could go on and on.  There have been many experiences that make this change edifying and testimony building.  You can feel that he is a spirit that came straight from Heaven.  He is an angel and you feel one step closer to the presence of God when you are with him.  I dare you to spend time with him and not feel the Holy Ghost testify of the love of our Savior and the truthfulness of God's existence.

I dare you.  :)

So here he is!  Adam Arthur Thomas, born May 18th at 8:28 am at Eastern Idaho Regional Medical Center. Delivered by Dr. Leavitt.  4 pounds 11 ounces and 17 inches long.  A sweet disposition and a love for his parents.  We still don't know why he came early, and perhaps we never will.  His road will be long, but he will catch up.  He will come home.  Then we will be a family all together.

By the way, I misspoke before.  I DID get to hold him on his birthday, for a couple of minutes while they changed out his bedding.  Then we had to put him back.  Please excuse the terrible hair, chubbiness and all around scariness and see how absolutely happy I am to hold my baby for the first time.  Teary eyed, I was so in love with this handsome little guy.